…someone told me s/he was impressed by the way I always [seem to] have control over my life. What!? Who?! Me?
Me, the person who everyday when I wake up asks life:
“What the hell do you mean when you suggest that?”
“Excuse me but how many calories are there in confusion?”
I always disbelieve people who state that they think their life is “splendid” or who always are happy with their own choices and decisions. I’m like: “Well, congrats to you! How about you now stop lying to yourself…?”
What I know about life is that if [read; when] it all falls apart then try to keep the stability for as long as possible. With any possible method of choice. Don’t shatter the crystal. Because everything that doesn’t kill you gives you deadly anxiety. Of this I’m sure.
When it’s not possible anymore to keep things steady; usually sooner than later; then just simply explode! (Or if that really should be ‘implode’?)
If someone really thinks that I have all my ducks in a row then it’s very probable that this person doesn’t know me very well. Because you know what they say; the only perfect people are perfect strangers.
Or could it be a matter of perspective? Maybe my asymmetrical messy ducklings are a bunch of a really slim looking and impressive Spitfires to someone else. Well, apparently.
…the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
…better days you can meet life and the world this way:
Then again some, like today, all you feel is this:
…when your own generation starts to appear in the newspaper’s obituaries. As yet not that often, but slowly and steadily.
There’s no escape route and all we can do is pretend to smile and make today’s more believable than yesterday’s. Let’s get the Colgate Ultra-White out. We will use it feverishly.
And don’t forget to call me Freddie Mercury because I’m the great pretender.
When we in the future remember 2014; what will we remember?
That Germany sent a nazi to the European Parliament and that big parts of Sweden was on fire?
No, probably not.
I fear we’ll do what we always do; recapture the past with what we want to remember.
That Germany won the World Cup and that the summer ’14 was the sunniest and warmest in ages.
We will recapture a feeling we never ever felt.
Nostalgia paints everything yellow and blue and has a memory just as short as the collective one.
…problems in life and perhaps the worst and most frequent hiccup in my personality you will find the fact that the solitude never fails me.
But today when I stood with water up to my neck, with only the calm sea and the infinite blue sky around me, that was not really an issue.
…I would have two ‘Breakdowns’, with extra Swiss chocolate sprinkles, in waffle cones but not a ‘Comedown’ or a ‘Bringdown’ because I believe they are smoothies made with lime juice. Which is something I just don’t like. They say it’s an “acquired” taste. Well, I simply can’t be bothered.
At this my favorite café the ‘Meltdowns’ and ‘Showdowns’ are different kinds of delicious sundaes and not the rather depressing and slightly warlike words they sound to be.
They’re just creamy, sweet as fudge and chocolate-y. And always just a bit over the top because that’s where the staff put the fresh cherries. Fresh; not canned.
I would even more pleasantly and gladly taste their milkshake ‘Shutdown’ or even the so much more sweet versions ‘Standdown’ and ‘Kountdown’. The latter, which I for certain believe would sooth me immensely, spelled with a capital ‘K’ because I’ve been told the owner is a German fellow.
My meandering journey might then continue with a touchdown (pun intended) next-door to the new burger joint where I can have a burger to go.
I like the one with barbecue sauce; it’s called ‘Bringtomind’.
…with a diamond in her beak. This is the storyteller: storytellers always steal their stories, every story has been told before.”
Philip Pullmann in Financial Times Magazine, March 16, 2012.
The same Philip Pullman on Freedom of Speech: